Magic Tree

Today, I met with my old friend, the magic tree. It was a beautiful, sunny day with all of the trees blossoming into their multicolored outfits for Spring. I was walking through the courtyard in Martin on my way home when I saw the magic tree, looking plain and droopy as usual. It had no blossoms, no hint of green at all, and its branches were slumping all the way to the ground. There were people walking all around me, and I didn't want to seem like a weirdo, but I wanted to go and say hello to the magic tree and make a wish since it had been so long.

See, freshman year, I came upon this tree, and I didn't know that it was magical at the time. It was just an intriguing tree because it didn't look like any of the other ones, and in some way, it reminded me of a smaller version of Mother Willow from Pocahontas. I always loved Mother Willow, so I went up to make a wish on this tree. When the wish came true (I can't tell you what the wish was), I decided to go back and make another wish. Making a wish on the tree consists of placing your hand on the tree, whispering your wish, and then kissing it for good luck.

So when I went up to the tree this afternoon, there was a guy standing there staring at me because I guess I looked sketchy. I quickly broke off a tiny bit of the tree and made my wish on the broken-off piece. When I peeled off some of the bark of my broken piece, a bright green center appeared. My tree is magical. It puts on a facade of ugliness, hiding away its beauty and magical powers on the inside. It made me happy, and my wish came true.

Things running through my brain:

Literary theory (mainly deconstructionism for the moment)

Xylophones

Lolita

Mountains (I can't wait to go hiking this weekend!)

Flying

Tiredness (have to be up and going by 7 am...)

How good that chocolate milk was

I had a really wonderful day. It ended with seeing Eleemosynary, which was surprisingly really fantastic. It was showing in Bellamy Theater, and I liked the intimacy of the performance with only the three actresses and the audience. One of my favorite lines: "That's just the truth of the body, not of the spirit." --Dorothea, the eccentric grandmother. She was my favorite character, by far.

I should probably get some sleep now, if that's possible. My body has gotten into some bad sleeping habits recently, and it probably doesn't help that I drink Mayan Mochas at 9 pm.

To finish, here is a bit of dialogue from my favorite movie (Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind):

Clementine: You know me, I'm impulsive.

Joel: That's what I love about you.

Joel: I can't see anything I don't like about you.

Clementine: But you will, you will think of things, and I'll get bored with you and feel trapped because that's what happens with me.

Joel: Okay.

LOVE.

I can't believe Grammie has been gone for almost an entire year. March 8. I'll be seeing you, gram. I bet it's so magical where you are.

Goodnight, everyone.

-Lauren

My Body Doesn't Sleep

I have not updated my blog in over a year. So many things have changed, and I don't really know where to begin. It was strange to read over my posts from Freshman year. Why does that seem like an eon ago? Even though I wish I could delete a few of them due to certain things, such as cheesiness, I think I should leave them. It's who I was and how I felt at a certain moment in time, and no matter how stupid it is, it was captured forever. (I want to live in this tree house)

It is almost one in the morning, and I really have nothing better to be doing except sleeping. I attempted to find the English subtitle version of Paraiso Travel on the internet but had no luck. It seems like an incredible film, with lots of sex, as is usual it seems with Hispanic films...Anyway, I have yoga in the morning, and I am looking forward to it as it is going to be outside in the amphitheater =) Hooray for warm, sunny weather!

Yoga has become really important to me, and I don't think I will be able to give it up now that I have started. The other night, Dorothy and I went to one of Phaedra's classes off campus at the Episcopal church here in Clemson. It was a Flow Yoga class, quite different than Ashtanga! We focused on our breathing and finding the "crystal light" behind the blackness of the eyelids. Apparently, this light resides in the center of the eyebrows, and when I focused enough on that one spot, I did begin to see different colors past the dark, and it helped me to relax even more. Toward the end of class, we were all in Savasana and Phaedra came around and put this amazing pain-reliever cream on our necks. It's sort of a mix between Vick's Vapor Rub and Icy Hot, but it smells like pine needles and mint and leaves your neck feeling all tingly and wonderful.

Talking about that yoga class leads me to the woman who spoke to me before the class started that night. She was friendly, and when I told her that I am a student at Clemson, she immediately went on to ask the typical questions--what is your major? what are you going to do with that? etc, etc. I said, "Well, I'm an English major", which of course led her to ask, "Oh really? How interesting! What do you plan on doing with that?" I sat there on my mat and thought, finally saying, "Oh, I don't know really. I will eventually be a writer of some sort. I will probably end up in grad school after Clemson." ... "Oh! Do you know what you will further your studies in?" Oy vey, lady! "Umm...well, Literature? Theology? Zoology?...how the hell do I know?" Of course, I left that last part out.

I can't think about things like that. My communications professor said today that "the reason you are all in college is so you can rise to the top, be the executives of the world, the leaders..." I was sitting there doodling instead of taking notes on "what a group is" and thought that isn't at all the reason I am in college. I don't want to be an executive or even a leader, necessarily. I am in college because I love learning. If I could make a job out of learning, which I probably can somehow, then I would. I want to learn languages, cultures, religions, all of the above. I definitely don't want to slap together my e-Portfolio, ship it off to some gigantic company and be overjoyed when they give me a job as a paper-pusher or coffee-fetcher where I can eventually "rise up the ranks" to be an executive in twenty years. No thanks.

....intermission....

I can't wait until it is warm enough for me to sleep outside. I'm going to buy a hammock and have outside nights. I am also a bit nostalgic for the confused bird that used to hang around the apartment door and screech at 4 in the morning. Maybe all the other birds mutinied. Poor guy.

I also can't wait to start Lolita. It makes my heart beat faster just to read the first paragraph. "Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins. Lo-lee-ta: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth. Lo. Lee. Ta....She was Dolores on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always Lolita."

In my arms, she was always Lolita.

And with that, I say goodnight.

~Lauren

Hospitals and Chubby Groundhogs

This is a post that has been long due. I apologize, mainly to myself, that it has been exactly a week since I last wrote, but I have been rather busy being sick and all...haha. Yes, I have been sick and today is another doctor's appointment! Mi favorito!! Hopefully I can get all of this mess straightened out and just BE WELL. So, what has been happening with me lately? I can start with last Wednesday...

(Well, actually late Tuesday night)--I was having stomach pain, nausea..oh no, not a stomach virus. I tossed and turned and tried to sleep, but to no avail. After a night of no sleep, mi despertador dinged, reminding me that it is wakey-wakey time. Well, I'm already awake, thank you. I shut it off angrily and tried to sleep some more. I could not fathom dragging myself, in pain, to class. After a few hours of some broken sleep, I called home and said that I needed an appointment at the health center. Although the health center is right across the street, my mom had to come and help me get over there.

We both had ideas. Appendicitis seemed quite likely since I was showing quite a few of the main symptoms. The nurse saw me, they took a blood sample, and ohhh...your white blood cell count is rising. Go to the hospital and get a CT scan please. CT scan. I've had one of those before. They aren't so bad. Ha, little did I know!

So we went to the hospital, and thankfully since my mom works there and has connections, I was well taken care of. Then they gave me two cups of the most disgusting crap you could ever possibly imagine. It makes me gag just to think of it now. Oral. Contrast. Is. Crap. In. A. Cup. My mom said that I was lucky because I had the kind that they mixed with Crystal Light. I didn't taste anything resembling Crystal Light, thank you,....vomit.

So, since the cup and a half of contrast that I had gagged down decided to come back up, they had to wheel me (in a wheelchair!! it was fun, sort of). I was wheeled into the CT scan room, where they proceeded to make me as comfortable as possible. Now it was time to try the IV contrast since my stomach seemed to just be too weak. But my tired little veins let me down. After five different people, and five needles inserted into various parts of my forearm, the nurse told me that she had never in her life seen veins like mine. Oh joy, I'm a special case. Soooo not what I want right now. I moaned, "why can't I just be norrrrrmaaaaall??" Finally, she decided to try my hand. The last resort. I closed my eyes and thought...big juicy veins, come on, you can do it body....while giving my tired body a little pep talk in my head, the nurse continued fumbling around near my hand. She was just about to give up when BAM! Got it! Finally. I could feel the liquid start flowing cooly into my tiny vein. Once the test was over, I breathed a sigh of relief. Now to head over to the ER.

I was wheeled into the ER, where they quickly took my information and placed me into bed in a room, the needle still in my hand, in case they needed to hook me up to another IV. A nurse came in, and I told her all of my symptoms. By this time, it was late. I'm not sure what time, probably around 9 or 10 p.m. I was still in a lot of pain and I was exhausted since I hadn't eaten anything, so they hooked me up to an IV with some medicine that "might make you a bit sleepy." About one minute after the medicine started flowing into my system, my talking became a bit slower, and then I slept. and slept. It seemed like I slept forever, but then they woke me up and sent me home. I wanted to just stay in that bed. I was warm and sleepy and finally not in a lot of pain, but then I thought about having to stay in the hospital and have people poking and prodding me all through the night. No thank you. I got out of the bed rather quickly.

I slept for hours and hours at home. Sleep is amazing. Nothing hurts. Then you wake up and reality hits. Welcome to the world. You have bacteria inside of you that are screwing up your intestines. Nice. I was very grateful that my parents live so close. I could not imagine being in that much pain and having to deal with it basically on my own. People at far away colleges with health problems: I commend you.

Anyway, I stayed at home through Sunday night when I was finally feeling the effects of the medicine. I was ready to get back to school!

So what is in Lauren's future?
1. good health
2. happiness
3. prosperity
4. just kidding.
5. contra dancing on Friday. hopefully pictures to post. (I'm getting slack with pictures because I have no camera)
6. more dancy dancing on Saturday night for roomie's birthday.
7. THANKSGIVINGGGGG = Florida. My grammie and poppy. My aunt. My cousin. =)
8. METRIC show in Atnalta Atlanta Talanta on the 28th!!

OHhhh and. Lauren has a secret. =D Wanna know what it is?

Beautiful Thing #1: You shall never know. Except that it involves a person.
Beautiful Thing #2: The leaves on the ground when they are wet. Just don't slip!
Beautiful Thing #3: I am no longer sick
Beautiful Thing #4: Flannel Friday. My name is Lauren the Lumberjack and I approve this message.

--Have an amazing day!! Go find something beautiful. My mom found a fat little groundhog that was running across the yard.

-Lauren

Beautiful Thing #1: Waking up in the morning to my own quiet thoughts. I hear the traffic pass by on the streets. I smell the pumpkin-spice scent from the air freshener. I slip my toes into my warm slippers and click the button on the coffee-maker. It steams and the drip-drop of the coffee into the pot is my morning melody. I look into the mirror--good morning, you are beautiful.

This past weekend has been filled with amazing moments. I went contra dancing here in Clemson on Friday night. After dancing for almost two hours straight, my feet were screaming, but I just couldn't stop dancing. The feeling is electric, like it could just go on forever, with my mind completely focused on the music, twirling without any care in the world. If I just spin fast enough...
Saturday night was the football game. It was my first Clemson game as a student, and it was definitely the most exciting game I have ever seen. I actually watched the entire game, which was surprising, seeing as how I hate football. I yelled until my throat was hoarse, I jumped up and down...I was pushed down the bleachers by a guy who fell on top of me...and Shannon and I did a bit of guy-stalking/watching. Not really stalking, haha, that would be strange. More like admiring. =) After the game, we ran out of the stadium, "We won!!" I was yelling and spinning around. My adrenaline level was insane...I don't know how long both of us ran around. Police looked at us probably wondering if we were drunk. Nope, who needs to be drunk? I can be like this without alcohol, and I will remember it in the morning, thank you.

Well, I can't believe I already have to leave for class again, but unfortunately I do. I will have to post some more later and actually put up pictures this time. If only time would pass without any consequence.

How to Annoy an English Major 101

Step 1: Spell definitely wrong. In fact, go ahead and spell it in ways that couldn't even POSSIBLY be correct.
--I have met only a handful of people who can spell this word correctly. It's not hard guys. The word definite, plus LY. Not, defunatly, definatly, deffinately, or any other ridiculous way.

Step 2: Use their, there, or they're incorrectly. They're means THEY ARE. Does anyone remember contractions from oh, say second grade? There has to do with the an object. I am going there. The parade is over there. Etc. Finally, their is possessive. Their books. Their blah blah, whatever. Get it?

Step 3: "Its right over there." No IT'S not. "IT's right over there." Its = possessive, just like with their. Its books. Its food. IT's = IT IS. What is it with contractions?

Step 4: How are you doing? I'm doing good. Oh really, what kind of good things are you doing? Charitable things? Most likely, this is not true. (You might be doing charitable deeds. If so, that's great). It should go like so--> How are you doing? I'm doing well. You use good in a situation like this--> That outfit looks really good on you. This pizza is good.
I don't like the word good anyway. It should be replaced. Sorry good, you suck.

Hope you've learned some awesome new ways on how to annoy your English-major friends. =)
This is not meant to hurt anyone's feelings. If you do some of these things, IT's ok. I love grammar, but I suck at other things also. Oh...that reminds me.

Step 5: To, Too, and Two. I think we all know that two is the number. Duh. So let's get down to To and Too. "I'm going to the mall." "Oh really, can I come too?" Got it?
Bam, you are now a grammar god. Not really, but you can pretend.

My next post will be friendlier and I will go find something beautiful and such. =) peace.

Beautiful Thing of the Day: YOU

As I was sitting with some friends earlier, we took out Cosmo just to sift through the pages and make fun of the articles and such...everyone likes a little trashy reading now and then. But what we found was more than a bit of funny reading--some of what we read was just downright degrading. Most of the time, I feel that as a woman, I am accepted and treated as an equal. After reading comments in Cosmo from men and what they "really want to hear from a woman," I was frankly disgusted. We read a list of "what men really want to hear," and it included,
1. Ooh, after a long day all I want to do is give my man a blow job.
2. Oh wow, that laundry really needs to be done. Let me do it for you.
3. Let me make you some beef jerky.
4. Would you mind if my girls from the volleyball team showered at your place?

REALLY?!?!?! What is this, the freaking 50s?!! Women, seriously, I hope that no one gives into a man like this. We deserve more respect than to be put down like this. We are empowered, we are beautiful, and we don't need the perfect figure to attract a man. This is so frustrating.
Try this: go out one day without doing your hair or putting on any makeup. Embrace your own beauty without constantly fretting over what guys are thinking about you (or other girls for that matter--we all judge each other just as much). Personally, I go to class almost all the time with no makeup...and the most time I take to do my hair is about ten seconds when I stick some bobby pins in it.
I am not saying do this all the time. I mean, we all know that looking cute sometimes is really fun. I love to get dressed up, makeup, hair and all, and go out, but we don't need to dress-to-impress all the time. Love who you are without the mask.
--Lauren

Fold It

I just can't seem to find the energy sometimes, or perhaps the inspiration. Where did my creativity go? Am I turning into everyone else? Do I have anything really interesting to share with the world? Who knows...

I just know that right now, my body is aching, I'm tired, and I'm watching the Yankees lose to Philadelphia. I don't even watch sports on television, but it came on after Big Bang Theory, and since I am alone in the dorm room again, it's nice to have some background noise.

I suppose that I should mention what I did for Halloween/Homecoming weekend. Well, it was raining here in good old Clemson, South Carolina, but I still managed to have quite a bit of fun. Friday night, my roommate sprung a party on me at the last minute, so I had to come up with a quick costume (since Betty Boop was not quite ready to be shown yet). First I was going to be a ninja, then a gypsy, then finally decided on being a tiger. When we were ready to go, we headed outside to be picked up by a van, aka: clown car, with ten of us packed in like costumed sardines. The apartment that the party was at was really nice, but it's always a bit awkward being in someone's apartment that you don't know from Adam. There were actually three degrees of separation between the resident of the apartment and myself--I am friends with someone who is friends with someone who is a friend of the apartment owner. Oh well. So I watched people get drunk, ate Doritos, and marveled at the plethera of costumes. There were cavewomen, the Mr. Clean guy, the Sham-Wow guy (I know right?!..awesome), this random guy with a blow-up duck costume, and various other costumes that I don't feel like mentioning (mainly because I have a terrible memory and forgot the rest).

So that was night #1. Then on Halloween, I was dressed awesomely as Betty Boop (complete with feather boa, fishnet stockings, and a ridiculously short dress), and went to see Rocky Horror for the first time. That was an experience I will never forget. In the words of Forrest Gump, "That's all I have to say about that."

After Rocky Horror was a spontaneous trip to La Casa de Waffle (aka: Waffle House). It was great as always.

Lauren's Order:

1 Cheese and Tomato Omelet

Hashbrowns

Toast

Lots of Coffee

That is always my order and will forever be my order. I think I am the only person in the history of the universe never to have ordered a waffle at Waffle House.

After Waffle House, I terrified myself by watching Haunting in Connecticut. I am seriously beginning to think that watching scary movies can become an addiction. I know that it will scare me, and I don't like being scared, but then I watch them anyway. Maybe it's the adrenaline or something? Idk...scientific-y neurony brain stuff.

Anyway, now I am procrastinating more homework.

Beautiful Thing # 1: I made an A on my history exam. Take that you stupid TA that gave me a D on my last paper!! I am not a D student, and I now have two A exams in that class to prove it! Yes, the picture is placed at the top of my blog because it made my day. I think I'm addicted to the feeling of getting good grades...

Beautiful Thing # 2: I have one class tomorrow, and it doesn't start until 12:30!! Sleepy time.

Goodnight world. (I just thought of Goodnight Moon...aww...happy book)